You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
