that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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