If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
