We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
there is glitter all over my balls
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
