Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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