The maid of honor just puked.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
