dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize