hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
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