So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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