dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
