I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Randomize
