Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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