She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
