My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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