I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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