You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
