My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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