Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
