i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
