I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Randomize
