Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
