we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
