Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Randomize
