apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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