Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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