Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
