biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
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