No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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