"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
