i just google imaged poop.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
