I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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