HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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