You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize
