new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
porn star boner night. come get it.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
