I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
you never un-have a 4some
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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