You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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