Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize