it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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