Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
