i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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