My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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