I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
