I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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