i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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