Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
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