I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
