I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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