have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Randomize
