New low: just hacked my moms facebook
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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