The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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