East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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